Yes, it’s pricey stuff. But there is one class of consumer who need not pay. If you’re an American veteran who was shot in combat, then you may be gifted a flask of FHP, gratis. No charge. You’ve already paid the price.
Yours in the pursuit (and preservation) of America’s treasures,
SO YOU'RE FASCINATED BY THE FACT that it's a secret older than the United States, and you'd like to imbibe some?
THOSE WHO KEEP US THAT WAY
As the purveyor of the bona fide FHP from the fabled memo, I'm happy to oblige. But it is, after all, a secret and storied elixir, and I can’t exactly offer it up at convenience stores alongside the Wrigleys and the gobstoppers. It’s a tad more august than that.
First, a word or two about what happens with any proceeds. They will be used, primarily (and just like the proceeds from my other ventures) to
fund my pro bono documentaries that do things like honor military veterans and practitioners of racial harmony. To wit:
FHP free for
Now, back to matters of commerce, and appeasing those who are thirsty for a sip of the storied elixir...
In keeping with the spirit of the original environment in which FHP was made and consumed, I offer it up only at certain private events and tastings. Preferably in remarkable locales—be it an elegant clubhouse, or a remote military outpost. One potential customer exclaimed, rather excitedly, “Do you mean to say that I have to apply for the privilege of having some custom-designed flasks of the real Fish House Punch at my party?” It was a fair question, and I deliberated long and hard on the proper response before finally saying, “Why, yes, that is it exactly.”
FISH HOUSE PUNCH
A secret older than the United States